Here We Go... Again
I haven't looked at this blog I started in years. Here it is August of 2019 and I am still dealing with the same issues I had back when I first started this blog back in 2013. I'm almost exactly the same weight as when I started 6 yrs. ago and not much has changed in that respect...
In April of 2018 in a desperate attempt to get my weight under control once and for all I had the gastric sleeve surgery. 80% of my stomach was removed and I actually lost around 50 lbs. from that. Less than a year and a half later I've gained all but 6 of the pounds I lost back and have reverted back to my old habits of eating before bed, in the car and eating large portions. The surgery did not work because I did not follow the program. It's much more of a psychological issue with me than anything else. I've started seeing a therapist to deal with my health & wellness issues which I feel very hopeful about. I'm confronting a lot of deep psychological behaviors that I'm becoming aware of in a different context from before. I'm dealing with addictive behavior patterns that are centered around using food for comfort & to fill a void in my life.
To Have What You Want, You Must Give Up What's Holding You Back
Lessons are repeated until they are learned. If you pay attention to your life you'll begin to see the patterns.
The conversations I'm having with myself are the same conversations I had back in 2013. Even though I know my life could be a lot better, I hold on tight to old behavioral patterns knowing that is the very thing that's preventing me from getting what I want. I'm giving up my dreams and my greatest potential for something that is not serving me. For my future to be bigger than my past, I must learn to move beyond it. I must stop living in the past.
Let it go... let it be what it was, the good & the bad.
If I want things to be different I'll have to do things differently. Every next level of my life will require a different me. I can make this change... I can give up what I have for what I want.
Create a list of everything you want in exchange for what you must give up. /what are the reoccurring thoughts that keep running through your head?
Make a list of everything you want in your life. EVERYTHING and then think about whats holding you back from realizing your dreams & ask yourself if you're willing to give up what you've got in order to have something better.
Yes
Yes I am.
